Forget Romeo, These Lawyer Pickup Lines Are Guaranteed To Get You A Restraining Order

We’ve all seen the Romeo and Lawyer also Juliet love story and we’ve all heard of the phrase star-crossed lovers, but have you ever wondered what would happen if these two great literary classics merged? Would their love still be as powerful? We think not.

That’s why we are here today to give you an alternative, to present you with the greatest lawyer pickup lines that will surely get you your very own restraining order.

‘You’re so fine you must be perjury

In this modern day where social media is a great way to stay connected with old friends and meet new ones, we forget that many predators are lurking out there looking for their next prey.

It’s hard to believe how clever these pickup lines can be and how they could catch you off guard so quickly. Lawyers have some of the best mind games of all because they’ve been strategizing for years on end.

Don’t get tricked by a sexy lawyer because they’ll run circles around you in seconds flat if you are not careful. Be wise when getting into anything with someone as dangerous as a lawyer.

‘Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I pass by again?’

What better way to hit on a potential partner than with a joke about love and the law? Here are some witty pick-up lines designed to work in any city. Who knows? You might find your perfect match.

‘I’d like to extend my presence

Whether you’re a member of the human race or not, legal documents are necessary to be able to operate in society. Birth certificates, passports, and driver’s licenses –

without these little pieces of paper, people would either be unable to interact with their surroundings at all or they’d be living under some weird system of feudalism.

We can’t really rule out that the first scenario is a potential result of life without government oversight but let’s stick with things we know for sure. Nobody likes paperwork but that doesn’t mean it should go untouched.

Since there’s so much knowledge floating around about legal processes nowadays, it might seem like lawyer pickup lines are ineffective at this point but rest assured: everybody loves lawyers!

‘So uh…this isn’t harassment right?’

There are an endless number of lawyer pickup lines out there to choose from. But trust me, these are some of the best in the game.

So uh…this isn’t harassment, right? Just think about how flustered a potential victim would be after hearing that one. Don’t take my word for it though, go ahead and try out one of these babies and see what happens!

‘Sorry, ma’am. No mean to stare but do you come here often?’

Here are some lawyer pickup lines for those that may need a more refined approach to score their next victim.

How about we grab some drinks sometime? I promise it’ll be harassment-free.

‘Sup babe? Remember me from the last time you visited my office? (pulls up shirt revealing naked torso) Nope, not yet? Let’s schedule that meeting ASAP!

I would never sue anyone…, especially over a guy as sexy as you are.

I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I was making you feel uncomfortable.

I swear it wasn’t me! Maybe it was one of my colleagues who has the same thing going on with you?

Are you sure it’s not just a misunderstanding?

So…what’s the new pussycat?

When it comes to pickup lines for lawyers, no one does it better than Sick and tired of being kicked around like a puny little kitten. Here are some other lawyer pickup lines you can use on your next move: I’m an attorney. I help my clients get what they want.

Let’s get judicial with each other. Hi. How would you like to go through life without worrying about a divorce? It would be great if we can make a final decision today.

If your neighbor kicks your cat I’ll be happy to testify on your behalf.

If the love of your life was constantly interfering with your good time then you might want to consider a restraining order. And if said partner happens to be your cat-loving neighbor then lawyer

pickup lines are in order. Whether they’re coming on too strong or they just can’t take no for an answer here are a couple of classy ways to stop them in their tracks.

1) I may have found someone more willing to feed me and pick up after me 2) I’ve discovered other free scratching posts 3) See you in court?

Call me! 555-FELONY!

1. When you ask if I’m a lawyer I reply Yes!
2. Your honor, I plead the fifth for misrepresentation
3. ‘No dice? Let’s roll!
4. Check out my resume; it’ll get you hot and bothered for justice!
5. Aren’t you honored to have me as your defender in this matter?

Baby Girl Got Back. And she knows how to use it. *pat pat* 😛 *mic drop*

Now let’s get to the fun part. I’ve compiled a list of lawyer pickup lines for you to use on your next date with a white woman to make them run away fast as they can.

You’ll have so much time to focus on other things then! 😉 Here are my top five:

1) Well, I’m a criminal defense attorney. How many felonies can you count?

2) Daddy likes playing games too, wanna play with him?

3) Work it, momma. Let me see you get low right now…low.

4) Do you mind if I handcuff you first? For the office of course.

5) Hi! My name is

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